Childhood Speaking

The first time you ever speak, it must be a miracle.
The first you voice what you are thinking must be
an act of wonder.
I don't remember my first word...
I would have to ask someone.
Then have to depend on their memories...

I wonder if the first time I learn to speak to God
is marked somewhere in time.
I wonder if the first time
I echoed a prayer I learned,
or a prayer I created
is etched somewhere eternally.

I remember hearing songs for the first time, and I cried
within me, because I didn't know the words. I was either too young
or I didn't know the language.
It is a silent grief to not be able
to speak something, and it stays un-said or unnamed.

The PSALMS were like that to me.

David hiding and fearing that he could never
have fellowship with ones he loved,
Moses stuttering and stumbling in the wilderness,
wondering what he had to do or say,
Zachariah losing his ability to speak,
the inability to connect to someone you are trying to reach
and keeping pent-up thoughts within you for a long time

I imagine that even the trees speak
and the waters splash in their language
and the animals bask before the sun in honor of Him
and the fish jump and skip to see the sky
and I can even quietly say that my first word,
even though a sigh or a hidden wish could reach up to Him
and create a new hope within me
to try again to learn to take the next steps

I remember I heard a song
that soared like the wind
like a sail quivering in the breeze
like childhood, innocent and free
to say and pronounce with fervour
wishes deep inside me
toward someone above
and wishing them to join me again
in my thoughts and words

I wished as I stretched my hand toward you
for someone to speak back to me
and I was so happy to forego this need to
speak when I wanted so much to hear His words
echoing my words
a magical harmony, a key
that opened a locked-up world
so that even when I write a song
for a song, for someone out there
to come and live within me
an intense longing to understand this as
a child's yearning and curiosity does
as it takes over an entire world.

For the Song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dUKOK_--8c&feature=related

For a certain book also...
your words brought Him to me.