Childhood Speaking

The first time you ever speak, it must be a miracle.
The first you voice what you are thinking must be
an act of wonder.
I don't remember my first word...
I would have to ask someone.
Then have to depend on their memories...

I wonder if the first time I learn to speak to God
is marked somewhere in time.
I wonder if the first time
I echoed a prayer I learned,
or a prayer I created
is etched somewhere eternally.

I remember hearing songs for the first time, and I cried
within me, because I didn't know the words. I was either too young
or I didn't know the language.
It is a silent grief to not be able
to speak something, and it stays un-said or unnamed.

The PSALMS were like that to me.

David hiding and fearing that he could never
have fellowship with ones he loved,
Moses stuttering and stumbling in the wilderness,
wondering what he had to do or say,
Zachariah losing his ability to speak,
the inability to connect to someone you are trying to reach
and keeping pent-up thoughts within you for a long time

I imagine that even the trees speak
and the waters splash in their language
and the animals bask before the sun in honor of Him
and the fish jump and skip to see the sky
and I can even quietly say that my first word,
even though a sigh or a hidden wish could reach up to Him
and create a new hope within me
to try again to learn to take the next steps

I remember I heard a song
that soared like the wind
like a sail quivering in the breeze
like childhood, innocent and free
to say and pronounce with fervour
wishes deep inside me
toward someone above
and wishing them to join me again
in my thoughts and words

I wished as I stretched my hand toward you
for someone to speak back to me
and I was so happy to forego this need to
speak when I wanted so much to hear His words
echoing my words
a magical harmony, a key
that opened a locked-up world
so that even when I write a song
for a song, for someone out there
to come and live within me
an intense longing to understand this as
a child's yearning and curiosity does
as it takes over an entire world.

For the Song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dUKOK_--8c&feature=related

For a certain book also...
your words brought Him to me.

Two songs for you!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A7Z5JV5cZec&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IknJtAMQMRE&feature=related



For the parents and family of a child:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AuJrEBtmM1Q)

Song 4 Lucia Mendez

We are all pulling for you,
Lucia.

May you find comfort in the arms of all your friends,
fans, and your family.

~Jo


"Un Amigo Es"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wPp-Q_fl6gE&feature=related

Donde Estan Corazon?

This is for all the cats wandering outside
looking for their owners.

Or possibly looking for new owners?

Your devotion calls to mind what the heart
is searching for in life.


"Where are you? Where are you?"


For the lost cat from Colorado:
For the lost cat I call, "Whimsy"


Enrique Iglesias:

http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/e/enrique_iglesias/donde_estan_corazon.html


con letras... (lyrics included at site)

To my cat who gave me CPR:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AuJrEBtmM1Q

Brief Prayer

Kyrie Eleison
Christe Eleison
Kyrie Eleison

Lord, have mercy.
Christ, have mercy.
Lord, have mercy.


I found this prayer in a bulletin of a church in
Edgewater. It is an Episcopal church.

I remember
it years ago from a catholic service I attended
when I was a teen.

Then when I heard the following song on the radio briefly in the eighties, I recalled
the words again.

Kyrie Eleison



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XNKbHJ3PTu4&feature=related

Day Three: Moments

http://www.downloadmusic.ie/claireroche/bi-a-iosa-im-croise

Today, the series of moments I will experience will be heard by him.
I wish for a quiet heart, so I won't weep nearly as much as I do.

I recognize words in the song above.

I am reminded of Him in me, longing to speak
and sing the soul's song.

Today is yours also.



http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=103722552

For those who miss a true friend above:

http://www.elyrics.net/read/t/taylor-swift-lyrics/beautiful-eyes-lyrics-18.html

Day Two

Today, I want to agree with you.
I want to leave time in your beneficent arms.
I want to trust you completely,wholly,
not doubting your plans for the world.

If I question you, pardon me my doubt and
my questions themselves.

May I search for you in quiet and directed ways.

May your radiance not singe me as I try
stalwartly to connect with you.
The last time I tried, I asked to see your face,
and I nearly collapsed in your arms.

I am not humble enough to shield my eyes
and bow before you. I knew you had to close my
eyes and breathe into me.

Forgive me my vain attempts to see you the way
I wanted to, sheer curiosity, and not in a true embrace,
and a true love for you.

This time, may I reserve a humbleness before you, to see you
when you want it, but not before.
Pardon me my vanity and arrogance before you,
holy majesty.

I make too many mistakes. I wish I could forget this flaw.
I can't.

I missed you.


Sometimes, I miss your name and words.

http://search.yahoo.com/search?p=you+tube+thy+word+is+a+light+unto+&toggle=1&cop=mss&ei=UTF-8&fr=yfp-t-890

http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/a/amy_grant/thy_word.html


I like to sing to you this way. Even when I am by myself and quietly
thinking about you.

I still miss you.





Resources: Studies in the Word

http://www.childrenssociety.org.uk/resources/documents/Appeals/christingle/8265_full.pdf

Day One: Wanting

"Every day is a flower before thee."

Today sort of ran away on its own, and yet I sensed you were there anyway.
It's what I needed to do, but not what I wanted. I know you are still there
even when my heart is divided like this. Someone said I am not talking to
you nearly as much as I should. Others have also told me this also.

I think they may be right. I do feel you in the little things that happen
during the day. Today, I think I saw the joy on my mom's face as she saw
the cats and wondered why we neglect all the little joys that come along.

Then I wondered at the sacrifice my family made for me today, taking me to places
I found it difficult to visit. Then they took me out for lunch. That was a little bit of time, but I felt that you made it right.

The cat wanted to sit on my lap twice also tonight.. Now it is waiting for me to finish posting. He is such a patient waiter. Yet I know that you are even more patient. The cats do teach me about patience and maintaining serenity.

My friend brought me chocolate cake also. He is thoughtful.

So I find you in all the small things that pass by unnoticed.

I forget to thank you daily. While I am thinking of other things...

I think I can say things to you plainly now. My heart melts when I think about the devotional time I have not practiced near to you.

I still know you will forgive me, like you did in the past.
I am not trying to take advantage of it even though it feels like I do.

I am too afraid we will get close too soon as before. My heart is waiting and yet denying this wanting within me.

May they above speak for me, and the ones by my side, also, when I have no words before you.


"Every day rises before you and retires into your arms in the even."

Blessed be you.